These 9 months!

The many many Mommy Blogs have inspired me to begin this blog - otherwise I was, and still am, a little skeptical about posting stuff about my personal life. Not sure whether am still on the right track, but I know that slowly this blog will be all about my Cupcakes and less about me!

So while I have documented countless little snippets, stories, words and acts of my little girl, I haven't ever put them up on the blog... And I guess its alright that way. But am sure that when I do jot down the tiny facts of my second newborn cupcake, I would be tempted to pen down a few things about my little girl too!

For now let's get back to why I started this post. I just wanted to list up the months and how I felt along - once you're done with the nine months, the baby mania takes you by storm and it gets difficult to remember anything at all. I have been on a complete memory loss ever since I became a Mommy - thanks to the million chores that automatically mushroom around baby care! Its been five years and am just on verge of recovering from memory loss and again on verge of losing it all over again - But its all worth when I see my sweet little girl every morning & would be now experiencing the sugar overload all over again!

Okay,before I further lose myself into Mommyhood intricacies, lets get to month wise updates:

Firstly, knowing the fact that we were now expecting our second one was quite a thrill. It was definitely planned, just like the first one - but the joy of succeeding at the attempt was quite an achievement in itself. This time we were (or at least I sure was!) more prepared to take the plunge. So I excitedly told my four year old little girl (Aanya) that God had begun creating a very lovely surprise for her! She didn't quite get it but accepted the news happily! 

Hmm.... now for the months....

August / September / October: 

It began with cramping back pain - just like normal cramps. This continued for about a week or two. Slowly I could also feel like there was something brewing within me - no, not tea or coffee! It felt like a volcano of nausea was waiting to erupt. Nausea was slowly developing within me - just enough to make me feel restless. Sleep was good, thankfully. So this is how August ended.

During September nausea kept growing & slowly I began feeling tired. But could still manage a normal routine through the day. A few smells definitely started bothering me - like the onion, sandalwood hand wash etc. This month I also began to develop a very faint but obvious depression - something I still can't figure out to date. But I felt depressed - wanted to be quiet, alone and just by myself for as long as I could. However, thank goodness for Aanya - she definitely kept me sane and normal. 

Overall, I still managed to eat normally (something that I just could not during my first pregnancy - right up to fifth month!). There were a few cravings - like fresh fruits, veggies, soups etc. And of course, felt hungry - quite hungry! At times I would eat something and the very next day have terrible aversions for the same food / ingredient! I remember I had tomato soup with generous dose of mint - I actually had one and a half bowl & the next thing I knew was that I hated mint. And right now, in 7th month too I actually dislike the smell & thought of having it. Crazy aversions. Crazier hormones that cause the circus within! 

Every half an hour or so I would feel hungry - I felt like a caterpillar devouring all the leaves of the tree... More than keeping myself satiated it the task of cooking that really got me tired and exhausted - a clueless cook is of no use! However, the month ended somehow with loads of help on food front from my darling hubby. He is simply so good at cooking!

End of September we planned a short visit to Lucknow & Delhi - Hubby had some work to finish & I got to visit my parents. 

October was definitely the highlight of this pregnancy - The depression grew by leaps and bounds. I just wanted to be alone, quiet, lie down all day long and feel & do nothing at all. We were in Lucknow during this time. All I know is that I was stuck to the bed all day long. I didn't talk to anyone, didn't laugh or smile much - just felt a horrible nausea all through the day & didn't really feel good. Aanya would watch cartoons on TV and my Mom would cook - all in the terrible heat of October! I felt really bad about the fact that she'd be cooking and sweating it out for us, while I lay on bed, totally useless and mindless. But I just could not help myself. She really took great care of the two of us - offering fruits, juice, meals and other light snacks all through the day. Had quite a few bouts of migraine too - good old October heat got me vomiting through a day or two with each migraine. So the nausea worsened off, tiredness increased & so did the depression. 

Just wanted to be out of the terrible state of my body - but it was just a week into October and the worst was yet to come!

Next I flew to Delhi. Again, mom-in-law made all the meals through the day & I felt guilty and burdensome about not helping her. The weather was atrocious and all I could do is to sit in my room with AC on.

Nausea did not subside, exhaustion increased and depression didn't leave me either. I'd constantly feel hungry, so keeping up with the battle between nausea and hunger, I was definitely confused about my food choices.

A few days later we came back to our home in Bangalore. I actually felt like being on a roller coaster of nausea & exhaustion due to the long flight. It took me 2-3 days to recover from the effects of travelling around. The next visitors were constipation & metallic taste in the mouth! I had not even recovered properly and these two symptoms got added to my list of never ending ones. 

Now the remaining 15-20 days of October were spent just figuring out how to battle constant hunger against metallic taste in the mouth, constipation, immense exhaustion and terrible nausea - all my warring enemies together! Not to forget, eye pain and migraines  - they left me with no choice at all (could not watch anything or read anything at all!!! This rather spiraled up my depression as there was just no source of entertainment that I could divert my attention to... ). Fruits & juices felt good, onion & cumin seeds smells were still on the high aversion list. But this hand wash particularly made me vomit every time I washed my hands! And I still hate it like anything.

November/December/January:

Metallic taste, Nausea & Constipation subsided only by the third week of November. During the second week, we shifted to our new house too. So the exhaustion levels were pretty high. Kept feeling hungry constantly. Slept well due to exhaustion. No major cravings but felt good about eating eggs in any form, fruits, biscuits and mildly spicy food. Depression slowly disappeared around the second week.  Nausea was also on verge of fading. Migraine still cropped up at times due to household chores etc.

December: Nausea vanished and I was back to my senses and well being. Except immense exhaustion, nothing much that bothered me. Breathlessness frequently appeared through this month - may be because I used to eat and then immediately lie down. A little walk around the campus certainly helped. Yet breathlessness and exhaustion left me a little dry for the festive season of December. Eye pain faded and I started watching a bit of movies/videos to entertain myself. But we still had a lovely Christmas & New Year! :)

January: It was good. Breathlessness faded. But energy levels were not good enough to get me going. I wanted to do so much - travel to some beach/resort for a short holiday, create something beautiful - but energy was quite low - rather a battle between desires and my lack of energy.

February: So far, great. I just had a sleepless night (day before yesterday) and still managed to sew baby blanket, pay bill, head out to the library etc! It was actually the most energetic day through these months. However, there are spurts of energy clubbed with sudden exhaustion... Perhaps the excitement to make things perfect before you arrive gives me that spurt & when am done, I pay for all the energy I burnt, ha! Nevertheless, feeling excited, energized and happier. All these creative desires seem to be bubbling out of my heart and am kind of ready to start working on the many things I have planned for my little one! 

And February is almost ending, so there is loads of excitement & anxiety too. Anxiety because I want everything to be nice & perfect... taking good care of Aanya and the new little one. And also because its after five years that we'll be repeating it all over again - baby care (although better prepared and equipped!)...

Two more months & we'd be rejoicing as a family of four. Would update the next two months for sure, right in this post.

The first 4 months went without a pic as I was too exhausted to take any. And I rather didn't show much until December...

March: March was a long month with lot of activity in & out of me! We packed and packed & packed till the 23rd of March, until we finally boarded our flight to Delhi! And of course, within me I felt lots of pokes, kicks, hiccups & tiny stretches... Ate well, slept okay - sometimes good, sometimes not so well. The weight has been increasing & so it gets difficult to turn or shift at night. I guess I did not feel so much weight / pressure in my first one. So this is new and good and strange - all at the same time. I will certainly remember the amazing breakfasts (yes, two of them) I had on 23rd March - one while leaving our home & second one at the airport. It was the most perfect south Indian breakfast ever! And I hogged it all! 

While in Delhi, we've been able to catch up on two great restaurants - the BBQ Nation & Chew. And I've hogged as much barbecued veggies as I could, devoured the dessert section & loved the Chinese at Chew.

Apart from food, its been deja vu while visiting our third & final gynecologist as she is the one who brought Aanya into this world!

April:  This is it. Its the 9th month. Eager to see you sweetheart. Every week I count which week it is and try to feel any signs of your arrival. Sleep is disturbed with many visits to the washroom, hunger pangs, heartburn and complete discomfort in sleeping positions. If I try & sleep straight I feel choked - as if someone is pressing all the nerves from within and I can hardly breath. If I sleep sideways, the pressure is so much that I have to literally lift myself with my hands and then gently change from one side to another - the entire circus lasting a good two minutes. And after two minutes begins the urge to use washroom, hunger pangs, water, lights - better to stay awake than sleep! But am sure all this will be worth when we hold you in our arms and feel you for the first time!